Understanding The Gay Teen

In the past, it could be said that talking to your teens about sexuality was relatively straightforward. These discussions normally centred on the average heterosexual relationships without any reference to alternative sexualities such as homosexual and bisexual orientations. However, it is imperative in modern society to teach our children about alternative sexual orientations and tolerance of those differences.

Gay teens are one of the most disadvantaged and vulnerable groups in society, facing the pressure and dangers of gay bashing' and other forms of homophobic bullying. There is a threefold likelihood of lesbian or gay teens being bullied than other youth.

These pressures in turn lead to a higher incidence of social isolation, alcohol and drug abuse, family problems, and low self esteem than their peers.

There is a relatively common belief that someone who is gay must have suffered some sexual trauma or has been influenced to make this decision by a gay adult. This is a myth as neither of these things influences sexuality. In the past, many have felt the need to hide their homosexuality and have lived their life feeling as though they are living a lie. However, in more recent times, teens are coming out' much more often and at a younger age.

Talking to parents about their sexuality can sometimes be difficult, if not seemingly impossible. If they have heard anti-gay conversations between their parents or others close to them, this may contribute to their fear. In some situations, these youth run away from home because they feel that they cannot deal with the reaction of their parents.

There are also many gay teens that are forced out of their homes by parents who are unable to deal with their teen's sexuality. Even for those who remain at home, the tension that occurs when the teen comes out' can push relationships between the parents and the child beyond breaking point. This can lead to verbal or even physical violent eruptions between both parties, leading to severe relational breakdown. The trauma of this resistance to the teen's sexual identity can be emotionally devastating. This resistance may be particularly high in parents who have been raised with the conviction that homosexuality is always wrong.

Becoming a teenager is already a big deal regardless of whether the person is heterosexual or homosexual but for the gay teen, the issues are far more frightening. Often, the teen is already having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that he or she is homosexual and is already fearful of peoples' intolerance of them. The ultimate rejection by their parents on the basis of gender issues leaves the person feeling totally confused and isolated.

The incidence of suicide among gay teens is around three times that of their heterosexual counterparts though sexuality and gender issues are not in themselves, seen as a risk factor for suicide. However, the feelings of isolation and of being different can drive many to suicidal behaviour.

Perhaps the difference in acceptance of homosexuals could begin in what we teach children in earlier years. After all, bigotry is something that is learned from a young age. Make your children aware that any form of hatred and discrimination is unacceptable and instil these values as early as possible.

When discussing sexuality with your children, explain that homosexuals have not choice and that they need to be respected as people just as anyone else does.

Let's do what we can to stop contaminating the minds of our young and causing the discrimination against other people, whether based on race, religion, or sexual orientation.

Gay teenagers need empathy from those around them and from their healthcare provider. Otherwise, they may feel isolated and worthless, thus pressuring them into taking risks with their sexual health. Having sex with someone of the same gender does not eliminate the risks of sexually transmitted diseases and gay teens need to be aware of this and comfortable enough to discuss these problems with their doctor without fear of prejudice.

Becoming a teenager is a huge milestone for both teenagers and parents and it is particularly so when the teenager is gay. As parents, it is important to reassure the teenager that being gay really is okay and that, regardless of their sexual identity, you love them anyway.

Though the gay community has gained some civil rights over the years, it is important to continue the fight to erode the conservative views on gay issues. Only then can the gay community have the same freedoms as their heterosexual counterparts.

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About Anne Wolski

Anne Wolski is the owner of http://www.softwaremegastore.net and http://www.annabellescheapies.com and http://www.travellintunes.com and has been involved in internet marketing for several years. She is both a mother and a doting grandmother. She has a wide variety of interests and loves to write.


And here is another random article you might be interested in...

Scrooge's Christmas List

"Cratchit, take your Christmas grab bag and be gone. Out, I tell you, or you'll be seeking new employment!" That scene wasn't included in Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" but I can easily picture crotchety old Scrooge taking Bob Cratchit to task for attempting to include him in an office holiday gift exchange. Scrooge certainly is the symbol of someone who doesn't like Christmas.

But, if you think about it, many of us harbor Scrooge-like feelings today. We really don't want to participate in yet one more gift exchange. We're out of both time and money.

The sad fact is that for many of us, Christmas shopping has become largely an obligation. We buy presents because it's expected. Take a look at your list. How many gifts are you buying because you really want to bless the person receiving it? And how many fall into the "I gotta" category?

Part of the problem for all of us is that most of the people that we buy for already enjoy material wealth. They truly "don't need anything". In fact, your present creates a problem for them.

Yes, I know that some think only a real Scrooge would take people off of their gift list. But, I'd disagree. Many of the gifts that you will give this season will actually hurt the person you give them to.

Here's how. They really don't need whatever you bought. It's just one more item to take up closet, cabinet or attic space. You've put them one step closer to needing a bigger house (with a bigger mortgage payment). You'll consume their time and money without adding any enjoyment to their lives.

And, you'll diminish your own life, too. Whether you consider this time of year to be an important part of your faith or just a time of goodwill, rushing from store to store will take your mind from the real meaning of the season. You will be focused on things. Not on the relationships that are important to your life. So I'd argue that it's really in the spirit of the season to reduce the number of people on your gift list.

In fact, you'd be doing friends a favor by not exchanging gifts. You'd both save the time spent buying and wrapping the gift. If you truly value that person, it's much better to get together for lunch or dinner and catch up on what's happening in your lives.

OK, in some cases it's not practical to drop people from your list. So how can you make the best of gift shopping?

Before you go shopping, consider why you're buying each present. Decide which people on your list are really important. You have a limited amount of time and money. Spend them on the people who are truly important in your life.

Everyone else should be handled without a big fuss. It's not that we don't like the people in our office gift exchange. It's just that six months from now they won't remember what you bought them.

An office party is a great place for a gag gift. Thrift stores can provide an assortment of items that can be used for funny gifts. Stuffed animals, clothing, coffee mugs and toys are fertile ground for the imagination. Is the recipient a stickler for time? An old alarm clock could be good. One where the hands have been removed is even better.

Many of us have far away relatives and friends. Unless you're particularly close, you might as well admit that you really don't know what they already have or what they need. So no matter what you get there's a good chance that it will need to be returned. Rather than combing the malls hoping that the perfect item will jump into your arms, why not consider a gift certificate from a national chain of stores. Or, better still, agree to a dollar amount that you will each spend on your own family. Do your buying after Christmas and send the 'giver' a photo of the gift that 'they bought'.

For local friends and relatives, think about where your lives intersect. That's the place to begin looking for a present. If you find that your lives have drifted apart, it's better to spend time catching up instead of shopping.

Then there's those very special people on your list. Your spouse, children and others who you truly want to make happy with a gift. Remember that it's not how much you spend. While it's nice to find a thoughtful gift for that special someone, what they really want is you. The people that are most important in your life want your time and attention. They want your happiness. Don't disappoint them by picking something that's expensive but impersonal.

Finally, please understand that this isn't meant to imply that you shouldn't give to those who need help. Not everyone in our world is blessed with the abundance that so many of us have. And the less fortunate would can use your gift. If you can afford to, please participate in Angel Tree, the Salvation Army kettles or other programs to help those who struggle. If you're really in the holiday spirit you'll feel much better giving that new sweater to a poor child rather than your Aunt Edna.

Nor is this meant to imply that you should ignore the holidays. This is a wonderful time of year. My hope is that you'd make the most of your resources and bring happiness to the people who matter in your life.

Here's to a wonderful holiday for everyone. Hopefully your holiday will be filled with joy and wonder.

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About Gary Foreman

Gary Foreman is a former financial planner who currently edits The Dollar Stretcher website You'll find hundreds of free articles to help you save time and money. Visit Today! View their website at: http://www.stretcher.com